Anyone could see that the Mr Yin Yang Lee was reading the menu word by word, his brows furrowed in concentration. The waiter began tapping his pencil against the note pad and his customer immediately got the hint and placed the order. Ten minutes later, the Chinese visitor was served cheese corn balls on a platter with a dip by the side. After having devoured the dish within the next few minutes, he signaled for the menu again. Now he wanted to study the items available on the main course. The title on the first page read “Chinese”. As if by reflex, he gave the menu back and turned to the waiter “Do you have any suggestions?” The waiter raised an eyebrow. “Would you like to try something Indian? What about some naan and butter chicken? I can get you some salad by the side as well”. Yang Lee nodded his head. He was all game to experiment.
Two tables behind him sat three wives of very hard working men.
W1 : “No!! I am not lying! Tanya IS going to France this summer.”
W2 : “Reaaaalllllyyyyy?? Her poor husband.. he works so hard for her nooo?? And the way she spends all her money. Tch Tch. “
W3 : “Why do you feel so sorry? Maybe he is fine with it.”
W1 : “No No,.. Maria. What Tara is trying to say is that she is not like us. At least we don’t spend it so frivolously. Ok, forget that.. why did she have to lie to us of all people? I mean it’s not like we will sabotage her trip or something. “
W2: “I knowwww sweets. Even I really felt bad you know…”
W3 : “About what??...the trip or about her lying to you??”
W1: “Uffooo… Why are u always taking Tanya’s side?”
W3 : “I am not taking anyone’s side. I just asked a simple question.”
W2: “Ok, let’s not argue about Tanya now. Btw ladies, how do you like my new Tote?”
W1: “Ooooohhh I like! Sooo youuuu! I knew I hadn’t seen that one before!...”
W3: “Its very pretty ,Tara.”
W2 : “Thank you ladies!! Mona, I was wondering why you didn’t ask me earlier. Giggles. You are usually the one who notices these things first.”
W3: “Ok, ladies. I gotta rush. Rishab has reached home from the crèche. His nanny just messaged me. Catch u laters.” W3 makes an exit.
W1: “Talk about kill joys!”
W2: “She’s always been like that. I told you we won’t be able to talk freely if she is around.. At least now you realize…”
W1: “Mmmhmmm….By the way, you know I think this time Tanya may only call her girl friends.. I just have this gut feeling and my instincts are usually never wrong.”
W2: “You serious!!!?...She will definitely ask us am telling you!!Hope your passport is in place?”
W1: “Yeah I hope she does. I have been telling Sameer lets plan an international holiday and he just doesn’t listen. “
W2: “Same here. Even Rishi doesn’t budge. And they say all we can think of spending money. It is not like we shop everyday or something………Why are they so working hard anyway?”
W1: “Beats me."
It looked like the fellas sitting at the adjacent table also found the conversation interesting.
“Dude, ye Tote kya hota hai?”
“Pata nahi, I heard it too. …ketchup pass kar….”
“Arey yaaar, iPhone leke kyoon baita hai? Google karke dekh na.. “
At the table diagonally opposite to them, four year old Sid sat licking his fingers after finishing the last slice of Pizza. His mom shot him the dirtiest look.
“Sid, Kya kar rahe ho? How many times have I told u not to lick your fingers? Sit down now, don’t spoil the cushions with your shoes!”
“Mamma what is thaaaat? ” pointing to her soup bowl.
“I also want…..”
“I waaaaantt mommy I waaaaant.. dada.. Tell her I want nowwwwww….”
Sid’s shrill voice obviously cut across the room. Most of us at Bombay Blues waited for the mom’s reaction. She obeyed instantly and Sid was quiet. The father pretended like he was not sitting at that table. He had his eyes fixed on his pasta. This 4 year old was in one of the best malls in the city with a shopping bag overflowing with toys, parents in tow, gorging on his Pizza. What on earth was he complaining about anyway? Very soon he would have his own twitter account and maybe even a BMW.
As soon as Sid’s voice died down, the Citibank guy walked across to the fellas with a galaxy tab.
“Hi…we are having this contest on Facebook…………..can you log on right now??” Social Media Marketing has become a big irritant.
By this time Mr Yin Yang Lee had left the restaurant with his naan and butter chicken left almost untouched. I think I know what spoiled his appetite.
Across the table, my husband was buried in his blackberry while my friend focused on her juice. And of course I was the nutcase making up all these conversations in my head.
Takeaway: If you have an imagination that can get the better of you, please DO NOT order steak.